Roses and Patience

On a cloudy, gray day a couple of months ago, a friend and I planted four little rosebush cuttings in my little front yard plot. We had talked about doing this simply to see whether or not it would work because I LOVE roses. Since this was an experiment we covered two of them in makeshift greenhouses (plastic soda bottles over the plants) and left two of them uncovered to see which would last or at least last the longest.

For a few weeks, nothing seemed to be happening except for a significant browning of the little leaves on my rosebush cuttings. Eventually, one of the plants died and there were only three left. The three living plants were barely living. 

I couldn't figure it out! They were getting enough water, they got the morning sun, they were taken care of and the weeds were pulled up around them. A thought came: what if it's the two black walnut trees that we have in our front yard? That theory was disproved by the fact that we have three other more-full-grown rosebushes that do extremely well every year.

Finally I took one of the little greenhouses off of one of the remaining cuttings. It began to die faster.

I was at a loss. I decided to simply let the Lord take it and I would run with it. 

A couple of weeks ago I went home and, as usual, stepped over my rosebush cuttings to see how they were doing. One of them was growing! It was fully growing! I was so excited! (If we're being perfectly honest, I am still super excited!) There were little tiny green and red leaves covering the small branches. The deep green of the soft diamond shaped leaves was enchanting. I stared. 

Then, only a few days ago, I went home again and noticed that, on the opposite end of the plot from where my baby rosebush was growing, a second rosebush was still alive! Barely a twig, it stood up from the ground with determination to keep growing, to push upward to the light.

As I looked at this little stick of a bush, I realized that because of the position this cutting was in, it took the brunt of the hot afternoon sun. That's why it was dying! I quickly positioned what had previously been its greenhouse in such a way that it allowed sun to get to the rosebush yet the heat of that star was not going to harm this precious life. 

Yesterday I looked at both plants and even more and darker leaves and branches were growing! Yay! 

Oh, the work and the research and the thought that I have put into these plants! 

"And because of your diligence and your faith and your patience...in nourishing it, that it may take root...behold, by and by ye shall pluck the fruit thereof..." (Alma 32:42) 

'By and by' is not a phrase that anyone uses much anymore. Shakespeare, being the king of fantastic words as he is, used it quite frequently but with at least two different meanings.
Many frequently, 'by and by' is associated with 'soon' or 'in a little while'. However, personally, my favorite definition is 'immediately'.
The Lord never promised that every endeavor we put our hand to would flourish immediately and indefinitely. In fact, He never promised that everything we did would prosper at all. Yet when speaking of that which is of infinite worth (the Gospel of Jesus Christ), our loving Heavenly Father gave us conditions whereupon we would prosper: be diligent - keep trying and pressing forward, have faith - believe in God and that He can and will do all that He has promised, and be patient - often our time and way is not the Lord's.

I put in all the work I could. I prepared the ground, I weeded, I made sure the rose cuttings were in a place where they would receive water. Then, after they were planted I checked on them, I weeded and weeded and weeded some more. I watched and waited and prayed.
It took a lot of time. In this case, both meanings of 'by and by' are seen because I had to wait in order for my roses to grow. However, when the fruit of my labors was there, it was immediately apparent.

The Lord doesn't show us the entire way to the finish line while we're barely starting. He shows us a little at a time and only if we are paying attention will we be able to see the small and simple blessings, the 'tender mercies' as the prophet Nephi calls them (1 Nephi 1:20) that the Lord is giving to us in such great abundance. One of my tender mercies was seeing some dark green leaves smaller than the end of my pinky finger. Then, because I was watching and still working with my roses, (I was still being diligent, patient and faithful) the Lord blessed me with another: a second living and growing rose cutting.

Though it's only a little rose bush, or two of them as the case may be, I have learned a lot about how the Lord answers our prayers and prospers us: a little bit at a time, so slowly sometimes that if we're going full-steam ahead without thought, we'll miss those answers and blessings. The Lord has promised that He will not leave His children comfortless but will provide a way - often more than one way - for us to be blessed with those things that we stand in need of.
"Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not unto thine own understanding; In all thy way acknowledge Him and He shall direct thee for good." (Proverbs 3:5,6)

What If You Fly?

I was getting ready to go to work and my roommate was listening to a song that I was unfamiliar with. (That's not unusual). One line kept repeating (obviously part of the chorus) and it simply said, "Why do I try? I know I'm gonna fall down."

Having just had a 30 minute long conversation with myself on a parallel topic I was struck by the height of appropriate-ness that I was witnessing. Ha. God has a sense of humor.

In a conversation - a couple of them, in fact - with my roommate, I told her, "I'm so afraid of falling that I don't even try to fly."

Her response was simple: "What if you fall? Ah, yes, but what if you fly?"

What if I fly?

Wouldn't that be worth any fear, any panic, any feeling of unworthiness or worthlessness? Wouldn't that be worth every pain?

What if I reach for those dreams of mine, reach for the moon and touch the stars?

In the musical "Mary Poppins", she sings, "If you reach for the stars all you'll get are the stars but we've got a whole new spin: If you reach for the heavens you get the stars thrown in." You never know what you may touch, what good you may do, who you may meet, how you may grow and learn if you never try.

(Believe me, I am reading all of this in first person).

Choose - Yes, it is a Choice - to move forward regardless of your fears. Choose something and go for it! We can be - we are our own worst enemies; don't allow yourself to be held back by you! I won't let myself be held back by me. That is my new resolution.

Said John Greenleaf Whittier, "Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: 'It might have been!'"

Do not let regret tinge the vibrant colors and experiences and people of your life. And if it does, get back up and start going forward again with a new and firmer resolve to not stop simply because you might fall.

That's when you'll probably fly.